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SoundGirl – Don’t Know Why

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“Right guys, it’s 2011. LOL-pop is over, and we need a new sound. You’ve got 15 seconds. Go.”

“Well, I’ve got this song. It’s basically a pop-reggae interpolation of Carly Simon’s Why, and someone tried this eight years ago and it just scraped into the German Top 40, so I think if we can pitch it to the kids we’ve got a sure-fire hit on our hands. Think Ace of Base for Generation Z.”

“Excellent. Who’ve we got for this?”

“I was thinking Girls Aloud.”

“Too pop.”

Lily Allen?”

“Too reggae.”

The Saturdays?”

“Too preggae.”

Little Mix?”

“Who?”

“Never mind.”

“Well can we just send someone down a local school and find three pretty girls? I’m thinking hi-tops, oversized T-shirts, that sort of thing. Total budget for this is in the region of £10k, and we need a music video from that too. Make sure it’s sunny.”

“On it, boss.”

Three weeks later…

“PERFECT. Send it to radio. Incidentally, who’s that girl on lead vocals?”

“She calls herself Little Nikki.”

“Never heard of her.”

 

Entered chart: 02/07/2011

Chart peak: 45

Weeks on chart: 1

Who could sing this today and have a hit? Basically every band I’ve name-dropped in this article, except for SoundGirl.

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